I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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