Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
