hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
