he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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