Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
