Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
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