i always forget guys have bellybuttons
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
