I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize