So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
We got so high we made milksteak
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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