So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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