had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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