Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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