He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
