so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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