Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
and she was petting her beer can
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Is Oprah even human
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize