You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
