did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
