yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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