420 ftw
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
