is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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