it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
