Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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