It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
