I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
