I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
