I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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