He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
