why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
