No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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