Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
