it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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