If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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