I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize