Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
