what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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