2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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