Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
