dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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