i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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