Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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