Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
