she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
