What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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