theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize