let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
