what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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