wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
