he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
