all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Randomize
