Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize